Baba says, “The easiest effort of all is to give blessings and receive blessings.”

Even if you don’t know anything else, Baba says, it doesn’t matter. If you don’t know how to give lectures, it doesn’t matter; if you find it hard to imbibe all the virtues, if you find it hard to control all the powers, leave that aside too, He says. But just imbibe one thing: “I have to give blessings and receive blessings.” Check, He says, if you know how to give and receive blessings.

It feels natural to bless those who are kind to us or do good in the world. But God says, even if someone gives you sorrow, you still have to give blessings. To give blessings doesn’t mean placing my hand on someone’s head but rather it means refusing to harbor negativity towards others, living with compassion and forgiveness. There are two words, Baba teaches: one is ‘correction’ and the other is ‘forgiveness, mercy’. “You make a lot of effort to offer correction“, He points out, “but you don’t know how to forgive.“

Indeed, I often find it hard, if not impossible, to forgive someone even when God Himself advises it. “Could this really be God telling me to forgive them?” we might think. “Not after what they did to me!” I can even feel betrayed by God, as if He’s taking their side by asking me to forgive.

But the truth is far from this. God asks me to forgive others not for their benefit, but for my own liberation. Unforgiveness is a favorite tool of Maya, blocking my spiritual progress and creating a barrier to God’s love. When I carry unforgiveness in my heart, I can’t truly remember Baba and experience His love; my mind becomes consumed by what so-and-so did or said. It drains my happiness, my zeal, our enthusiasm – it’s like the wind has been knocked out of my sails, preventing me from soaring. God Himself is showering me with beautiful teachings daily, but the weight of unforgiveness holds me back, preventing me from fully connecting with the Father and the study.

But what about the betrayal, the hurt that I experienced? Let me realize that God never asks me to do any more for others than He has done for me. If I were to reflect back on my own mistakes, the hurt I’ve caused others, I’d recognize how much forgiveness God has extended to me. If not for His acceptance, for His love, for His compassion, I wouldn’t be where I am today. If I were to tally every wrong that done to me and compare that to what God has forgiven me for, the latter would be infinitely greater. As God’s child, all I am called to do is to extend others the same forgiveness and compassion I have received from our Father.

Sometimes, I delude myself into thinking I have forgiven but what I haven’t done is forgotten. So, while I believe I’ve moved on, the moment I see that person, the memory floods back, and I want nothing to do with them, actively avoiding them. Sometimes, hearing others speak kindly of them ignites an urge to “set the record straight”: “You have no idea what they’re really like…”

Your slogan is: Self-transformation leads to world transformation, Baba reminds me. Don’t wait for others to change, He teaches, because then neither will they change nor will you. Your attitude should be: I have to change. Going to Baba with pleas like: “Baba, fix this, then I’ll be okay,” or “Make that angry person calm, then I’ll also calm down,” or “Remove this obstacle-creator, and the center will be fine,”etc. is to prove that I am not a self-sovereign, that my happiness depends on someone or something else. Let me realize that God is far more interested in changing me than He is in changing my circumstances; in fact, as the Purifier, He uses situations and people to draw out those negative attitudes, to liberate me from strongholds and build my character.

Often, I hold on to a grudge, waiting for an apology. “That’s the least they can do”, I think. While that might happen, it also might not. People can only give me what they have; it takes self-worth to be able to acknowledge a mistake and apologize. At this point in the cycle, Baba says, Ravan has robbed every one of their self-worth and so that apology may never come. But by waiting, I hinder my own progress. It’s as if I have handed the person who hurt me the power to dictate when I can be free and move on, not to mention allowing them to continue to hurt me in the meantime. By forgiving and letting go, I break free from their hold, liberating myself and, in turn, liberating them by releasing the debt I believed they owed me.

To truly forgive, to show the tolerance and mercy God has shown me, I need to be full of His power. He is called the Almighty Powerful not because He can bring the dead back to life, but because His mere remembrance burns away all my sins and makes me light. It fills me with love, gives me rest and comfort. And so He says: “Have love for Me“, yet He observes, “you still forget Me“. “Your remembrance should be like a fire“, He says. We see powerful examples of this in the lives of Meera and Brahma Baba, whose remembrance and love were indeed like a fire that not only burned away any hurt feelings but also, because they were so full of God’s love, peace, rest, and comfort, they found it effortless to forgive others. Without experiencing these attainments from God, being asked to forgive can feel like a sacrifice. “Where there is love, there is no labor.”, says Baba. “If there is labor, then say from your heart, “Baba, my Baba!” and the labor will finish.”

Mine is one Baba and none other. I turn to Him for all my needs, He is the source of all attainments, not other souls. I receive from Him and give to others– that is the principle. It is when I try to receive from others that I get in trouble. Brahma Baba shares his own experience: “These thoughts continue to come throughout the day. But then, this is the effort that you children too have to make.”