Baba says, ‘you are a Mahavir soul‘. Mahavir children can never fluctuate.
In the scripture, Hanuman is shown to be Mahavir. His specialty was ‘one Rama and none other’. When He tore open his heart, in there was just the One Rama. That was the degree of his love and faith in the One. Baba says, ‘make Me your One trust and One support’. Have I done this? or am I still knocking on doors?
Most of us have walked away from gross bhakti- going to the temples and prostrating ourselves before deities blindly. But do I still feel tempted to go to the astrologer just to ensure that everything looks good in my horoscope? The moment a situation comes before me, I shake and now I have to know what planet is where and what I need to do to remedy it. I say to Baba that I am His, that I will do as He says, live where He says etc. and then at work, I think: I really need this promotion and I have to do something about it. In fact, Baba Himself says that I should make effort….and so using a false crutch, I set out to hustle. I knock on the doors of all the people in positions of authority to ensure they like me, they know me, they see me etc. If that wasn’t enough, then I turn to Baba and say: Baba, now, You do the rest. Make them give that job to me.
I don’t pause to think: is this what Baba wants? Is this going to help Baba’s task? Has He asked me to do this? Or am I driven by my own desire for success in this old world? Is it becoming of God’s child to knock on doors to hustle for a place in the old world? Are my words and actions matching with my promise to God to help Him transform the old world?
Many of us suffer from the body conscious thinking that I can get stuff done by myself. That I know what’s right and that it is my job is to execute and ask Baba to help me out. Actually, it is the opposite. That was the approach I followed for half the cycle where I dictated to God to help me with my goals because I didn’t know any better. Now, I do. God is in charge. I raised my hand to help Him in His task. He will tell me what to do and I have to follow.
If He asks me to do something I have never done before, my job is to say ‘yes’ anyway and place the first step forward. I’ll find that help, co-operation comes to me. I find that the right tools come to me. If He asks me to do something that goes against my preferences, I do it anyway knowing that I am about to learn something valuable here. I find that indeed, a new part of my intellect that I hadn’t used in a while just opened up. Sometimes I do what He asked me to and on the surface, it seems it didn’t work out. Let me understand that I don’t decide the outcome or the definition of success, He does. God’s task cannot be unsuccessful. My job is to simply do.
Sometimes, I feel overwhelmed by my own sanskars and I come into self-doubt: am I really a pure, divine soul? I wonder if I got this whole thing wrong! Is there really a heaven? Do I remember Who is teaching me?
When a situation comes before me that is too big for me to handle on my own, is my first thought ‘Baba’ or is it ‘let me call so and so’? Draupadi is shown in the scripture where she is dragged into mid court to be stripped. She calls out to every single member in that court for help – some her husbands, the king, the queen, the ministers, the keepers of the code of conduct…everyone. She implores them to save her…but they are all bound by their own false, body conscious shackles of reasons. In the end, she surrenders to the Lord and He and only He comes through.
To think of Baba last is not the sign of having made Him my One trust and One support. It is a sign that I am still clinging on this one and that one and thinking that they will help me. And yes, maybe one of those people is indeed the right person to help me but let God make that decision. Let Him touch that person’s intellect such that they can help me. Even that soul needs to understand what/how to do…God prepares them so they can help me. Let me learn to let go of the habit of taking over the reins.
The greatest gift I have at this time is my recognition of God. In this confluence age, He comes and take charge. He says: give me your burdens, give me your responsibilities and become light. Simply consider yourself a soul and remember Me alone. Having come from half a cycle of body consciousness, we can think: that’s lazy! Surely, I need to be doing something! Yes, I do….I need to let Him do His job. I need to step out of His way. I need to hand over the reins and remain still and stable inside. That’s how He can touch me with directions on what He wants me to do. If I am up and down, in constant fluctuation and in upheaval of: ‘this happened and that happened’, ‘I think I should do this…’. ‘should I do this or that?’, ‘maybe I should talk to so and so..’ , I am not listening.
When I have faith in my relationship with Baba, I trust Him. I know He’s here and already taking care of things. When I trust, I feel light and carefree. Then I fly. That’s what Hanuman did. When Rama told Him to take His message to Sita, Hanuman asked for guidance on how to get to where she was….there was an ocean, mountains in between. Rama told him that he could fly. Hanuman at that point didn’t question Him and ask: ‘but I am a Monkey, how can I fly?’ or ‘I don’t think that’s true, I’ve never flown before…’ or ‘but the ocean scares me…’, he flew. Then every mountain, every wave, every tree looked tiny. He was flying above them all and soon enough, safely and soundly, he had reached his destination.