सब राज़ी खुशी है? (“Is everyone happy?”) यह भी कोई पूछने की बात है? (“Is this even something to ask?”) Accha! बाबा याद हैं?
It is sung ‘O traveler of the night, don’t become weary while walking on the path to heaven.” Baba reminds us not to sulk and always remain full of zeal and enthusiasm. And yet, more often than not, I feel tired, let down and frustrated. Why?
Maybe I start by understanding what I am tired of or let down by. One feels tired or let down when one does or gives a lot but feels as though the return was minimal. It could also be because something does not go according to plan or a does not receive co-operation.
But then Baba says, ‘Simply perform every task in My remembrance and success will always be yours’. He says, ‘when you make The Seed yours, the entire tree will co-operate’. He promises to even enter the body and perform the task Himself if needed but He will never allow His child to fail. So then I ask myself if I am doing each task is His remembrance. Am I doing each task in the awareness that it is His task and that He is therefore responsible for it. This awareness is what governs the quality of my thoughts and how I feel is nothing but an expression of my thoughts.
If I feel tired or frustrated, then I need to check if I have the awareness of a server or if I am performing the task to prove myself. When I let go of the burden of responsibility and consider myself but an instrument in the hands of the most capable One, I have no fears, no insecurities and nothing to prove. I am not tired because He gets it all done for those that do in His remembrance. For them, He takes complete responsibility for their every step, every second. There is then only the feeling of lightness, freedom and happiness.
I always start a project by saying I am it for God but really when I check a level deeper, I note that I am really only thinking of myself. The only goal I, as His child, have is to reveal God. While we all share this same goal, we err when we try to define the steps to get there. For example, I equate service with giving a rousing lecture to a huge crowd of people that will then throng the centers because of impact the lecture had on them! Or I picture myself giving a TV interview answering every question with such ease and charisma that everyone is in awe. I see myself as the rightful leader of a particular service program- of course my idea was great and I don’t understand why others cannot see what I see. If only everyone could co-operate in ‘Baba’s task’ and stop creating obstacles due to their selfishness, I could reveal Baba today!!!
Really? Clearly, I am doing all this for Baba, right?
I reveal God through my every thought, word and action. That is an ongoing journey, a lifestyle, a continuous process till my last breath in this mortal body. Revealing God is not associated with nor limited to a particular kind of task. It is instead an internal, very personal journey that transforms me into a being filled with happiness, into someone that is full of virtues which I naturally donate through my every task. It is not about glory or fame in this old world but all about how stable I am internally in the face of praise or insult, success or failure. That is the face of a ‘Shakti’, Shiv’s Shakti.
There is nothing wrong in participating or even leading a task but it is wrong to desire it. I can raise my hand but with the sincere unadulterated thought that “yes, Baba, I am here if you need me”. With that awareness, I don’t feel disappointed but rather proud that I was able to raise my hand too and realize that the right decision was made. Baba needs me to continue doing what I am doing – serve with every breath, every second of my life- sometimes in more visible ways and sometimes in not so visible ways. I continue to work on myself, on ensuring that I am ever-ready for anything Baba has in mind for me at any time. That’s all. I don’t control the way I am used by Him- that’s His choice. That is being a true instrument.
I invest in the process, not in the outcome. It is when I try to control the outcome that I risk being disappointed because there is an inherent selfishness involved. And when I am disappointed, I am no longer in a frame of mind to serve. My state is disturbed and I am now, ironically, the obstacle that I think everyone else around me is.
A destination or goal helps me stay focused and lets me check if I am headed in the right direction but I need to stay flexible in terms of the path to get there. If I am adamant about what I should do or not do, I certainly will not enjoy the journey, will get weary and may actually never make it.
राह में कांटे एक दो नही होते
राह कांटों से भरी होती है
मंज़िल उस राह के आखिरी चोर पर खड़ी होती है
जहाँ हर कदम पर मिलती एक नई चोटी है
उसे देख जिनकी विश्वास डगमगाती हैं
वे मंज़िल को भुला कांटों में उलझ जाते हैं
जिनकी नजर मंज़िल पर होती है
वे कांटों पे ही चल कर मंज़िल को पा लेते हैं