Baba says, “You know that you come here to become Narayan from ordinary humans.”

When asked what we’d like to become, everyone says, “Lakshmi and Narayan”. We want nothing less. And yet, we don’t want to do the things we need to do to attain that destiny. To become Narayan foundationally requires a complete surrender to God– the Father, Teacher and Satguru. He cannot remove the impurities, the obstacles, and the strongholds within me unless I give myself to Him fully and completely. He reminds us, “You called out to Me: O Purifier, come and make us impure ones pure.” and yet, when He comes ready to do just that, we pushback. We want Him to take away our problems, but God cannot take my problems without taking me first.

Most of us are pretty good with the surface things- we change our diet, our clothes, our entertainment choices. We learn to trust God when we find ourselves in a crisis or are asked to do something we feel inexperienced for; we remain carefree: “Baba will take care…’, we say. We pay attention to our thoughts, our words, our attitude… but struggle with that one stronghold or mental block that feels painful. That stronghold, more often than not, tends to be a relationship. Baba asks me to forgive that person who betrayed me, to let go and I understand Him intellectually, but when it comes down to actually forgiving, I find myself holding on…not ready to let go. I find myself rewinding what happened, even if it happened years ago; It was too much, too painful, it turned my life upside down…and so I find myself unable to forgive. If it’s someone that is around me, whom I need to see daily or often, it’s worse. It’s like I become a different person when I’m around them. If someone else speaks nicely about them, I am tempted to set the record straight and tell them exactly who ‘they really are’.

And just like that we go from being the calm, peaceful, well-behaved, royal children of God, future deities, to those who’ve lost all their inheritance. We go from being liberated in life to losing it all and becoming tied in bondage in a second. “But it’s too hard…”, we think and go on to justify why we feel the way we do. God says, “You’ve asked Me for a lot, do you want it or not?”

God in the unlimited Father who comes to give me the unlimited inheritance- the sovereignty of the whole world. He doesn’t come to make me a slightly better version of my current self, or an even more better version of my current self or even the best version of my current self… He comes to make me His most elevated creation; He comes to give me the whole world. Why wouldn’t I take it? By following His shrimat in all the other areas, I’ve moved closer and closer to the goal. It’s so close, He says, I can see the trees of the golden age, I can see the golden outfit of Narayan ready for me to wear. Why would I come this close and allow one person to hold me back from my destiny. I forgive not for them, but for myself. I forgive to set myself free from the bondage and allow myself to move forward.

I don’t need to be best friends with them or even hang out with them, but I do need to take them off my heart-throne and place Baba back on there. I need to let go. Indeed, it’s hard; yes, it feels painful but then as Baba says, “Your reward is so high too. Surely, there would be some effort involved.” When I remember Baba with all my heart, then I am able to overcome pain with His unlimited love. Understanding deeply that this is the time of settlement and that the Father is here enables me to take that step of courage.

Baba says, “You know that you come here to become Narayan from ordinary humans.” That is complete transformation. Narayan is “full of all virtues, 16 celestial degrees full, completely viceless.” I’ve signed up for nothing less. Let me allow the Purifier to take away every single thing I don’t need so that I can become full of all the things I do need. He’s here to take me all the way, let me go all the way.