Dying alive

Baba says, ‘here, you have to die alive‘. Sometimes we hear that phrase and feel that it is quite harsh. But it is not.

Baba comes to us at the end of the cycle and finds us at our worst, degraded state. We were lost having forgotten who we are for half a cycle. We fell prey to Ravan, the five vices, and squandered away our inheritance – our very spiritual identity, dignity, peace of mind and contentment. We became beggars begging for respect, love, peace, appreciation from one and all. Many self-made gurus and priests tapped into our ignorance and emptiness and falsely promised us everything from success to peace to salvation itself. And while we knew deep inside that this is not the way, we went along anyway…we were desperate.

Baba came and reminded me of who I am and equally important – Whom I belong to. I belong to Him, He is my Father. I am no longer an orphan wandering, looking for a name, a home and a sense of belonging. I have found it!

But Baba says, it is a wonder that not everyone feels the intoxication. If I did, there would be no limit to my happiness and when I am happy, Maya cannot attack me.

When I hear Baba tell me each morning about who I am, about the inheritance – I feel happy but I forget as soon as I step outside into the world. I get drawn back into it. Baba says, you have to die alive. I have come and told you who you are, I have made you my child, why then do you insist on going back to your old life of worries and attachments?

If a poor child wandering the streets is adopted by a wealthy family, the child get absorbed into the ways of its new home, its new family. It doesn’t go back to the streets where it had nothing but stumbles and wounds. It finds new identity, new parents, new lifestyle and that helps it erase the memories of the old life and old ways. That is dying alive…its a good thing.

Baba has made me belong to Him…why don’t I accept Him as my Father? He is giving me back my inheritance- the one I squandered away- once again…why don’t I claim it from Him? He is offering me His companionship, His love, guidance….why don’t I take it? He wants to take on all my burdens ….why don’t I let Him?

This is my new life, it is with my long lost and now found, true, spiritual Father. He is Truth because only He knows the truth. He is telling me…let me listen and accept. We’ve lived our old way of life for a long time and so it can feel hard to let it go. We’ve even felt comfort from it albeit temporary comfort every now and then. Its what we’ve known for a long time…so we can be afraid to change course. But let me remember Who is teaching me! Do I have the faith that it is God?

Yes, I lived with Ravan for the second half the cycle, but I also lived in Ram’s world for the first half- those sanskars, the memories of that life is within me too. Let me emerge it with God’s help and reclaim my inheritance- when I do, I don’t just transform my own life but bring about world transformation by ending Ravan’s reign for my brothers and sisters as well.

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