Baba says, ‘you need controlling power to be successful on the field of service‘.
The soul is the operator of the body, it controls the physical organs- makes them do what it chooses, when it chooses and how it chooses. That is controlling power. Similarly, there are subtle organs – the mind, intellect and sanskars. The question is: do I have the same ability to control these subtle organs and make work how, when and where I choose?
If my intention is to sit in Baba’s remembrance for the next 10mins and I find that my mind fluctuates, my intellect wanders…then, that is a lack of controlling power. If someone says something that I didn’t like and that causes me to experience an upheaval, then that is not controlling power. If something unexpected occurs and I start to question: ‘why did this happen?’, ‘why me?’, ‘how could this have happened?’, then that is not controlling power. If I, the soul, allow myself to be controlled by my organs rather than control them, then I cannot be successful in service or even just with myself. Stability is foundational to my experience of peace or any other attainment and certainly for service.
This is why, controlling power over these subtle organs – the mind, intellect and sanskars- is what is called self-sovereignty. Only when I have these organs in control will I be able to make the physical organs work with discipline.
The way to imbibe controlling power, Baba says, is to always keep the contrast between the old and new, the degraded and elevated in my awareness. Whatever actions I perform, if I continue to see the great contrast between pure and impure, truth and falsehood, the difference between awareness and forgetfulness, the difference between the wasteful and the powerful, then my intellect is automatically controlled. It’s job is to discern and so I keep it busy with just that. Then, it automatically goes toward that which is elevated. When I forget to see this contrast and simply move along, then I perform the wrong action because for half a cycle, the intellect has been let loose and I have followed the herd i.e. adopted old world ways. I have to break that cycle, retrain the intellect.
The next is to remember the aim, what I am studying for.
I am studying to reclaim my sovereignty. By definition, I won’t become a sovereign if I walk away from people, from my roles, from my responsibilities. Those souls are called sanyasis….the opposite of sovereigns. Sovereignty and success is about living in the household, with the family, in the world and being in control of how I live, being able to stay in the midst of impurity and serve.
And so when things don’t go as expected or get inconvenient, I cannot think: I need a break from this place, from this type of service, from these people so that I can make my stage good and show everyone. What does it mean to work on my stage when I don’t have the triggers that enable me to work on it? What exactly would I be working on? And so to say: ‘I am fine, it’s just this one person…’, ‘if I move to that place, then I will be fine’ or to think an opportunity will help me make my stage: ‘they don’t give me opportunities here to help me grow…I should move elsewhere’ doesn’t make a whole lot of sense. The whole point of ‘building my stage’ is to realize that it’s not about what I do or my accomplishments, it’s about who I am. Irrespective of what my role or project or place or service companions might be like, am I in control of my thoughts, words, actions, attitude? Or do they depend on things going my way, the stars aligning in my favor?
These are all thoughts that make me step away and once this stepping away becomes a sanskar/habit, I won’t be stable anywhere. The intellect will develop the habit of constantly changing and thereby cause constant searching and discontentment.
Baba has the most service companions- so many of us with so many different sanskars. But He gets along just fine with each of us. In fact, we love Him, think He is the only One that understands us so well, we gush over Him, think He is the best! How does He do that? Anyone else in His place would likely run away! He does it by always remembering Who He is, who I am and the beginning, middle and end of the story. He sees me and everyone else as souls…not as my role, not as my acquired sanskars…but in my original form – a pure, peaceful, knowledgful, loving soul…His child that is weary from a long, long journey. He comes to take away the tiredness and take me back home.
Always be generous hearted, He says. That’s what He is. He never loses hope in me, He never looks down on me, He never judges. In other words, Maya has no power over Him, she isn’t able to take Him off track from what He is here to do. He remains steadfast in His role in the Drama, doesn’t change place or time or think: let me find a different soul to help today…this one here is a bit much! nor does He ask for a break.
I am in charge of my thoughts, words and actions. My mind, intellect and sanskars are my organs, they WILL do as I say when I remember who I am. I am not this body or role, I am not successful based on accomplishment or approvals. I am successful when I am able to be myself, not matter what. That’s what it means to have controlling power or be a sovereign. That’s what it means to be a child of God.
Yes, I am a soul. After all that traveling I have become tired, exhausted and also fragmented. I have learnt many new lessons through Babas knowledge. I am grateful for the experiences and the beautiful souls who have inspired me to grow spiritually. Now I need to place this puzzle together. Baba teaches me how. Not by default and certainly not by character assassination. Only with His pure love can I restore my pure selfless love to myself and the world. Service comes naturally everyday. It doesn’t have to be visible to the world but incognito. Soul work is a daily activity as long as it’s done with the right intention.