Baba says, ‘you have to be a worthy server.’
After half a cycle of hustling, begging but still feeling empty, I have hardly any self-worth left when I come to Baba. He tells me things about who I am that I can hardly believe, they seem so far off from my current reality. And so I think and ask: ‘but Baba, I don’t feel worthy of such an elevated status. What do I need to do to feel worthy?’ And the answer Baba gives me is: ‘follow Shrimat.’
Baba’s #1 shrimat: ‘consider yourself a soul and remember Me alone.’
For half a cycle, I lived body consciously i.e. selfishly. In my search for identity and belonging, my every thought, word and action was driven by: ‘what’s in it for me?’. This is the exact opposite of the core value of the soul which is to give. As long as I keep taking, I will always be misaligned with my own truth and feel un-worthy, unable to respect myself. When I am soul conscious, I don’t need or want anything. I already have that which I was searching for- the eternal Beloved. I am full of all treasures and am constantly giving; as a result, I am constantly light and happy and situated in my high stage of being a self-sovereign.
‘To make those who are weak powerful is the greatest giving and co-operation‘, teaches Baba. ‘Are you still those who are taking or have you become the children of the Bestower who give?’, He asks. ‘Start to give, He says and in your giving, you will automatically become full because the Father has given everything to you.‘ The more I give to others what I have received from the Father, the more aligned I will become with my true nature of the soul; the more I will therefore, experience becoming complete. This is called being worthy, says Baba.
More often than not, I want to be the giver, the bestower but when that moment comes, I am unable to follow through on my intent. I see the external behavior of other souls and I don’t feel able or inspired to give. For example, I can’t forgive or I can’t be patient etc. Baba says, ‘look at the intent‘. When I realize that whatever their behavior, the intent of every Brahmin soul is to be a worthy child of God, then I am able to transform my ill feelings, my negative feelings for them into loving feelings. This transformation of feelings is what will enable me to be the giver. Feelings are the door of Maya, says Baba. Check any obstacle that comes, He says, and you’ll find that the reason is that, instead of having loving feelings, you have opposite feelings. Feelings first comes in the form of thoughts, then in words and then in actions. As are my feelings, so will I see the activity and words of others with that intention, that is how I will listen to them and come into relationship with them. Feelings can change intention. If, at any time, I have the feelings of jealousy for any soul rather than feelings of brotherhood, then misunderstandings rise and become a door for Maya. And so Baba says, check if at all times, you have only good wishes and pure feelings for all souls. It’s not just wasteful feelings but even ordinary feelings don’t allow me to serve. And when I don’t serve i.e. give, I don’t feel worthy.
‘Those who always have good wishes for all‘, Baba says, ‘can become close beads of the rosary because the rosary is a sign of closeness and elevated feelings for those with whom you come into contact and relationship.‘ No matter with what intention someone speaks or acts, you must constantly have elevated feelings for them. This, Baba teaches, is known as being victorious. I then have a right to be threaded in the rosary of victory. Even if I am not good at giving lectures or making plans, but if I can give good wishes to all, then this service is so elevated that it enables me to become a bead in the rosary. Don’t ever say: ‘he has bad intentions toward me, what can I do..’ says Baba. Good wishes and pure feelings have the power to transform bad wishes and impure feelings. You are a ‘world transformer’, He reminds me, you can transform the feelings and intentions of souls. Keep this aim, He says, and you can easily and automatically bring about the qualifications of an angel, equal to the father. This, is known as being worthy.
Always remember the main direction, says Baba: Constantly to stay in remembrance and to have purity in thoughts, words and deeds. You mustn’t allow the slightest impure thoughts or old sanskars touch the intellect, says Baba. Just think, I have to be a worthy server and become beaded in the rosary and so do trivial matters seem right at this time? Do the games of childishness and carelessness suit me at this time? Since I am preparing to go back home, should I still be playing with Maya at this time? Baba says, ‘you must follow shrimat like mama and baba and become equal.’ To become equal is to give the proof of love. The children who give such proof are called the worthy children.