A child of the Bestower

Baba says, ‘words of wanting do not suit the children of a Bestower, the Bestower of Knowledge and the Bestower of Blessings. They are the ones who give donations (daan) or blessings (vardaan) to every soul of the world.’

God has adopted me at this auspicious confluence age. He is my Father and He chose me to love and cherish. It was just yesterday that I was an orphan fending for myself in an unkind world, completely bankrupted of any sense of true identity, belonging and purpose and then suddenly, today, I am a child of the Highest-on-High, the Creator Himself! Sure, all souls are always His children, but I am His child practically at this time, through Brahma. He sustains me in a practical way- He loves me, provides for me, nourishes me, protects me, teaches me, disciplines me- the whole nine yards. The moment I recognized Baba as my Father and said ‘My Baba’ and He said, ‘My child’, it’s the equivalent of Him signing the adoption papers. It no longer matters that I was broke a moment ago, that I was powerless a moment ago, that I was virtue-less a moment ago or anything else; none of that matters, it’s history. As of now, I am the richest in the world- not because of anything I did, but because of Who my Father is! Wow, just like that, in an instant, my life changed and I went from a beggar to a prince.

Have I fully accepted my new reality? Do I answer to my new name- child of God? Do I consider myself an heir to the Creator? or am I still stuck in my past?

Often, I recognize Baba and accept Him as my Father but forget what that makes me! I forget that it means I am His heir. So I carry over past sanskars of wanting and begging over into Brahmin life. Previously, I used to stand in front of the idol and beg for mercy, for a little courage, for a little power: ‘O God, please help me..’, ‘O God, please give me…’, ‘O God, I am just the dust on Your feet, please have mercy on me…’. Now, I do this directly, even as I refer to God as Baba! ‘Baba, please help me get this promotion..’, ‘Baba, please let many souls come to this workshop…’, ‘Baba, please get me out of this situation..’ It’s like ‘Baba’ is a dead word, I just use it without realizing it’s implication for me.

Baba says, ‘words of wanting do not suit the children of a Bestower, the Bestower of Knowledge and the Bestower of Blessings. They are the ones who give donations (daan) or blessings (vardaan) to every soul of the world.’ How can I be the owner of the shop and still suffer a sense of lack? How can I be the prince with access to diamonds and still run after stones? ‘Remember who you are and remember Me’, He tells me daily. But when I am slack in remembrance, I pay the price by remaining stuck in the past. It’s like I have my car stuck in ‘park‘ even as my new Father is longing to give me a new life, full of everything I could ever want or need! It’s time to shift into ‘drive’ and get moving.

Sometimes, moving forward involves giving up these limited desires for name and fame, recognition, promotion etc. I have everything I need from God- the Creator has chosen me!, He approves me!, He has my name in His heart!, He has especially picked me to help Him in the greatest task in history which is the establishment of the new world!, is there any greater name, recognition or promotion? why am I lusting after recognition by humans when I have been recognized by God? When I realize and remain in my self-respect as a child with rights, opportunities and limited attainments come behind me like shadows; I have no need to chase after them.

Sometimes, moving forward means letting go of the sanskars of judging, rejecting or unforgiveness. It’s realizing that it is Ravan who is acting through people and situations, that it is he who is our collective enemy. Instead, when I hold grudges, move away from people, I hinder the Father’s task of establishment of one kingdom, one brotherhood. ‘Become merciful and a bestower like the Father‘, says Baba. He showed me mercy despite all my sanskars, and tantrums because He knew my heart; He knew that my behavior was a reflection of half a cycle of captivity in Ravan’s jail. Let me learn to look past the behavior as well, let me look at the heart intent.

When I first become full myself by realizing who I am in this new birth, I can become a bestower to my brothers and sisters who are still stuck in Ravan’s world like I used to be. It’s one thing to simply be a bestower of knowledge but that doesn’t touch or change lives. People have heard enough knowledge, they are thirsting for an experience of true selfless love, power, courage- those same things I was thirsting for. They, are still in front of the idol, and don’t even realize that they are stuck! They need help experiencing who they truly are and Whom they belong to so they too can move forward. To help them, I have to become an embodiment of the things they need- an embodiment of love, of blessings, of power, of confidence and courage. Then, I won’t have to say anything, I become the mirror through whom they automatically get a glimpse of their true self, of the Father through me. ‘Now, become the donors, great donors and Bestowers of blessings’, says Baba.

When I look at the picture of the world cycle or the ladder, I realize that there was a time for bhakti – it was the last half of the cycle. Now, is NOT the time for bhakti, now is the time to be the child. I have been adopted into God’s family, let me embody this new awareness and present myself accordingly in the world. This is the service needed at this time. I’ve spent a long time praying and begging for blessings, it’s now time to be a blessing to others.

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